I know that’s a song. But Laura is also the name of my Mama. It feels weird that I am going to write my thoughts about her considering that we don’t get along so much.

First things first, Mama’s family is from Malabon. She is the 6th child of Lola Menring and Lolo Pepe. They were a middle class family according to their eldest, Ninang Non. She went to a public school for her elementary and then to Our Lady of Grace Academy, a private all girl academy for high school. There was a time in high school that she excelled in English subject. She probably had a gift for the English language and she never fails to use it in correcting me whenever a fumble with it. In high school, she told me that there weren’t much luxury for it was the austerity period that time. They had to go to school, do their home works, study for exams and pass their subjects. Not much leisure, parties unlike my time.

For college, she went to UST and studied commerce. She was able to finish a double degree course that took her only 5 years. The travel from Malabon all the way to Sampaloc area she endured just to finish. Just imagine her travel during rainy season. Malabon is known for floods and high tides that basically paralyze the public transportation system and Sampaloc area is no different either during rains.

I am not really sure if she worked somewhere else before she entered Solidbank. My early memories of her work started with the bank. She married Papa who is also from Malabon in 1983. They had me, Alvin and Ces to complete our family. Papa was a mechanic and a professor in a technical school. He was with us most of the time since he work from the house. There were times that we stayed with relatives especially when they had to work. This is when a big clan comes in handy and I had fun being transfered from one place to another. They were all relatives anyway so why fuss.

After school, I remember me and my brother watching Disney movies in the Betamax for hours. He had no problem memorizing the scenes and dialogues of Cinderella, Ariel and Belle. My brother is thoughtful and I thank him for that. Mama would always bring home groceries for the three of us. She would buy 3 pieces of everything whether it’s Piattos, Cheez-It or Magnolia Chocolait to avoid a rumble. The three of us are very protective of our territories.

Mama worked hard and so did Papa. They had us study private schools in elementary and high school. I event went to OLGA where she went for high school. I thought I was following her footsteps but then again I said “I thought”. Don’t get me wrong, I graduated in her high school.

We quarrel a lot. We really don’t have many bonding moments. But it was fine with me. I wasn’t a very good daughter to pamper with time and affection. I understood perfectly. My Papa provided more and maybe that’s why she thinks I am closer to him. I tell him more stories. I gave my Mama her due with what’s happening in my life but we interpret it differently. She gave me my due as well but I was a butt head.

Mama loved Papa so much that she followed him when he went abroad to work. She left the three of us in a house near our relatives. I was 14 years old then, my brother 13 and Ces only 9. The situation was difficult for all of us. Everybody had to sacrifice. Before she left, she confided to me that she’s afraid my brother and sister may think that she doesn’t love us that’s why she’s leaving. She cried in front of me. I just said this is for our family. I didn’t know at that time if Alvin and Ces really understood so I didn’t really answer her. But THEY did Mama. We all understood.

Mama missed many things like graduations, JS Prom, enrollments, PTA meetings, birthdays and a lot more once in a lifetime events in our lives. She would only see us in pictures and hear our voices from the telephone if and only when we get our butts up to send it through email. We had our share of “teen attitude” though not alot of it. There were shortcomings, mistakes, pride and hardships along the way or our relationship. Or at least with Mama and me.

I learned various lessons from Mama. She was smart alright. She would always correct me in my English, give sermon when I do stupid things or make immature judgments. Her words of wisdom never ran out when it comes to me. I think there were even times when she gave up on me because I was so hard headed. I am sorry Mama, you were right that regrets always come at the end.

I hope when Mama reads this, she’ll feel my sincerity. She knows I am good with words like her so she may think I am just fooling her. You did a great job in bringing us up despite the distance that separated us. It was only me that did not listen.

Mama, if I can only bring back time, I would have listen more to your sermons and try to understand them. I would have followed your advices during dilemmas in my life. Those hurtful words that came from my mouth, they were only because of my immaturity and selfishness. I should have worked harder to give you something to be proud of. I should have followed your steps.

I think of you now, Mama. Because all the time, it was only you who thought of me.

I love our family too, Mama.

This entry was posted on Saturday, May 24th, 2008 at 8:01 pm and is filed under The Filipina. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.